8:17
“So how does this work? You touched the Magick mirrors and now we’re fighting our own distorted reflections?”
Gwen reared back from Dempsey, giving herself some room to plant her hands on her hips and stare up at him. Behind him slash in front of her Disapproving Gwen reflected back twenty-deep in the mirrors. Or maybe it was Confused Gwen. She didn’t really feel disapproving, though maybe, she considered looking at the twenty versions of hands-on-hips Gwen, the stance might confuse someone into thinking she was.
It was just – ugh! Mirrors and fun-house reflections and Big-Head Gwen trying to snatch them and probably eat them. Because that made sense. It was a lot to unpack. And all of it seemed to originate from Dempsey touching mirrors, if you went by his distinct attempts to not touch mirrors.
She got it. You didn’t talk your flavor of Magick if you didn’t want to. You also didn’t have to tell people the color of your underwear. It could be fun to do both, but you didn’t have to. But in this case, with his Magick putting them both at risk, you’d think he’d have at least hinted. Like, “Hey, Gwen, I can’t touch things without activating potentially evil effects.” You know, something like that.
“I wouldn’t say they’re Magick mirrors.”
“Then what would you-” Gwen stopped mid question and turned her head to look back in the direction they’d just come. “I hear something.”
Dempsey immediately fell into battle mode. He turned in the direction Gwen stared and raised his shield. He stood that way, tensed, shield and sword up, staring down the mirrored path for long mikros. Gwen lined up behind him, staring over his shield. And nothing came down the path.
He looked back at her over his shoulder. “Maybe you’re hearing things.”
“Maybe I’m hearing things that are there.” She stepped around him and started walking very slowly back in the direction they’d come. “I swear I heard-”
Her head turned right, caught by the sound of the mirror panel they’d pulled shut on the second hidden space they’d found sliding open. She turned mouth moving like a guppy’s, looking at Dempsey like “See!”
He immediately stepped in front of her again as the mirror panel slid all the way back and a duplicate Gwen came striding out of the space on elongated legs, the appendages moving like something from a cartoon or maybe like a daddy long-legs moved only that wasn’t right because daddy long-legs didn’t move like that and maybe she was just thinking daddy long-legs because the second Gwen had long-legs. And, wow, she was going off on a tangent!
Gwen lunged forward, jabbing at Long-Leg Gwen like she could shove her back into the hidden room. It might have worked too, if not for the fact that Dempsey Long-Legs took that moment to come galumphing out from behind Long-Leg Gwen thrusting Long-Leg Gwen against Gwen’s plunger.
“Back! Back!” Gwen yelled, shuffling forward and forcing Long-Leg Gwen back. Or that was the goal, only again Dempsey Long-Legs got in the way. Gee, like Dempsey like copy like copy like Dempsey who took a giant step in front of Gwen and bashed his shield into Long-Leg Gwen’s face. With a whole lot of force. Like maybe he was taking the opportunity presented to smash his shield into a Gwen-shaped face.
That line of reason was going to have to wait because Dempsey Long-Legs stepped right over Long-Leg Gwen as she dropped to one knee, a dazed look on her Gwen face. Is that what I look like when I’m stunned? Gwen spared a moment to think but then it was on as Dempsey Long-Legs strode forward with the disjointed grace of a Harryhausen monster and smashed Gwen in the face with his shield.
Gwen fell back against the mirrored wall behind her, sliding halfway down the surface before she caught herself with a braced hand on the glass. Luckily Dempsey Long-Legs had to stoop forward so his head didn’t smash the ceiling so he didn’t get the full level of oomph behind his swing. Still, it was more than a glancing hit and had Gwen feeling righteously sorry for Long-Leg Gwen having taken the full hit from Dempsey’s shield.
“Hey!” Dempsey swung his sword at Dempsey Long-Legs, landing a glancing blow on his copy’s shoulder before Dempsey Long-Leg swung his shield up and sent Dempsey’s arm and his sword swinging to the side and back.
Gwen braced a hand on the floor then looked over to Long-Legs Gwen who was slumped, ass on the floor and back against a mirror. The eyes that met hers were unfocused. Well, they were focused, but one appeared to be focused forward while the other was clearly staring at the side of her nose. Dempsey had definitely rung Long-Leg Gwen’s clock. Gwen almost felt bad about pushing to her feet, scurrying across the distance separating them and bringing her plunger down smack on the top of Long-Leg Gwen’s head. Even though she knew she had to do it she still cringed when Long-Leg Gwen’s shoulders fell backwards through the mirror behind her with the force of Gwen’s blow. It still didn’t keep her from planting her foot on Long-Leg Gwen’s chest and heaving hard to shove her doppelganger back deeper into the mirror.
Despite being half-buried in the mirror by now Long-Leg Gwen swung her plunger out, catching Gwen about perfectly in the solar plexus and sending her breath out on a whoosh. Pressing her free hand to her ribs, she fell back, gasping for air. Long-Leg Gwen’s torso rocked side-to-side, one shoulder then the other popping free from the surface of the mirror that rippled like it was made of water, not glass. Gwen spun around and aimed her butt in the direction of Long-Leg Gwen. The motion had the dual benefit of letting her gasp in more air as she bent forward at the waist and slamming Long-Leg Gwen with her booty.
Long-Leg Gwen had clearly not been expecting the thrust of butt to chest, or the awesome amount of thrust Gwen could get from such an action, because she went skidding backwards, her torso, hips, and a large portion of her legs sliding through the mirror. Gwen must have thrust her ass backwards past the point of the mirror because there was a sudden suction that dragged her back with her boots skidding across the dark tile of the floor. Cold seized her butt cheeks but didn’t make it as far as her hips or her legs.
Gwen didn’t need to look back to guess that it was only her butt protruding through the surface of the glass. She straightened up hard and her solar plexus screamed it wasn’t real happy with the move. She almost screamed right back at it but she didn’t have the breath yet for that. Once she was upright she spun around, dropped to her knees, scooped up Long-Leg Gwen’s very long legs and flung them towards the mirror. They flew like spaghetti, loose and wobbly on the air, meeting the surface of the mirror with a weird splat which was real obvious despite the sounds Dempsey and Dempsey Long-Legs were making as they fought each other to her left. Or maybe that was just sympathy for her doppelganger making the sound so distinct in her ear. Whichever. She couldn’t afford sympathy right now. She had some legs to shove through a mirror.
Gwen grabbed Long-Leg Gwen’s long-legs – that wasn’t getting redundant, nope, not at all – at the ankles and heaved them through the mirror. For good measure she pointed her plunger at Long-Leg Gwen. “Stay there.”
At least one of Long-Leg Gwen’s eyes focused on the plunger. That would have to do.
Gwen spared several mikros to watching Dempsey and Dempsey Long-Legs fight. Not just because it was kind of interesting, what with them having the same style and apparently the same instincts and the only disadvantage Dempsey Long-Legs seemed to have being he had to really stoop so he didn’t ring his own clock on the ceiling which was balanced by the fact that he was able to dodge ridiculously well on his Very Long Legs.
Dempsey Long-Legs bent his knees, bowing his legs out to either side where they vibrated like plucked rubber bands and forming a bridge of sorts through which Dempsey, not Long-Legs, lunged directly through. As soon as Dempsey was half-way through this bridge of rubbery legs Dempsey Long-Legs snapped his knees together and his very long legs warped around Dempsey’s shoulders so one of his knees, Dempsey Long-Legs’ knees that was, bent around to bang Dempsey in the nose with a subtle boing.
Dempsey’s head wobbled back and forth, side to side, and he stumbled around. He likely would have fallen if not for Dempsey Long-Legs legs being still wrapped around him. He barely got his shield up to catch the downward swing of Dempsey Long-Legs sword. As it was the force of the hit drove him to one knee, which consequently managed to break him free of the wobbly cage of Dempsey Long-Legs legs.
Dempsey dropped fully to the floor, height along the length of the hall so he didn’t come into contact with the mirrors, twisted so he was facing up and slashed his sword at Dempsey Long-Legs legs. Dempsey Long-Legs fell back, high stepping to avoid the swing of Dempsey’s blade as he brought it around in a back-stroke. Dempsey Long-Legs continued to high-step back as Dempsey squirmed his shoulders and worked his bent legs, digging his feet in and dragging himself towards Dempsey Long-Legs across the narrow hall, still swinging.
Dempsey angled his trajectory, driving Dempsey Long-Legs back towards the mirrored wall. Just as he was about to smack into the mirror, Dempsey Long-Legs juked to the left and Dempsey’s heel smacked into the mirror. Gwen cringed, waiting for the sound of falling glass. If Dempsey touching a mirror with his hand did something, what would happen if Dempsey broke one of the Magick mirrors?
Luckily it didn’t break but a spiderweb crack did form on the mirrored surface.
“Don’t do that again!” Gwen yelled, flying in from the side, sweeping her plunger at Dempsey Long-Legs to drive him back long enough for Dempsey to regain his feet.
“I wasn’t trying to!” Dempsey snapped back, throwing his shield up to block the sword Dempsey Long-Legs swung at Gwen’s head.
Gwen planted her free hand at the small of Dempsey’s back and shoved. “Try harder!”
“Not to?” Dempsey grunted as Dempsey Long-Legs landed a hit around the edge of the shield, slashing the sleeve of his jacket, his shirt, and parting the skin of his deltoid. His arm drooped, the edge of his shield with it. As Dempsey Long-Legs came in for another hit at the same spot Gwen popped up from behind Dempsey, swinging her plunger and scoring a hit to the top of Dempsey Long-Legs’ head as he was hunched forward and pointing his skull right at them.
Dempsey Long-Legs staggered backwards, his legs wobbling and undulating like loosened rubber bands. Dempsey didn’t hesitate to lift his shield best he could with his injured arm and run full-steam at Dempsey Long-Legs in a modified tackle, hitting him close to the same spot Gwen had and sending him wobbling back into the mirrored wall.
Just as it had for Long-Leg Gwen the mirrors surface parted around Dempsey Long-Legs. It must have been something about the angle of approach or the way his long legs ate ground that made sure the mirror swallowed Dempsey Long-Legs right up to the waist. Dempsey and Gwen dropped like they choreographed the move, each grabbing one of Dempsey Long-Legs spindly legs around the region of the calf and flung them through the surface of the mirror. Dempsey Long-Legs reared up against the mirror on his side, smacking his hands against the glass then pressing his forehead to it to stare intently into Dempsey’s eyes. He mouthed something. Dempsey gestured at his head with his shield, like he couldn’t hear. To make the point clearer he sheathed his sword and cupped that hand to his opposite ear. Dempsey Long-Legs smacked the mirror with a pointed finger. Gwen followed the direction of it, seeing the fallen shield on the ground, a mirror image of Dempsey’s.
She pulled an apologetic face at Dempsey Long-Legs, then scooped up the shield and tossed it through the mirror a little to his left so he wouldn’t get hit by it. Dempsey Long-Legs snatched up the shield, strapped it on his arm, then gave Gwen a very terse nod before retreating back from the glass. His retreating back repeated multiple times behind him, making the movement very dramatic and really demanding the eye follow it. Gwen was doing just that when Dempsey snapped, “Why did you do that?”
“Because it was his?” Gwen turned from the mirror, her attention locking on the blood on Dempsey’s arm. She reached towards it. “Here, let me see that.”
Dempsey jerked his shoulder back, twisting his torso away from Gwen. “It’s fine.”
“It isn’t fine.” Gwen drew a deep breath through her nostrils then forced a sympathetic smile. “If it isn’t fixed you won’t be able to use your shield well. Let me fix it.”
“Fine.” Dempsey rolled his eyes then rotated back so his arm was pointing towards Gwen. He didn’t flinch when Gwen brushed the fabric of his shirt back then held her hands just above the cut. Gwen unfocused her eyes, took another breath, then reached into Dempsey with her Magick.
While her Magick leaned towards mental healing she’d found out when she was really young, and therefore didn’t ‘get’ that there were limitations to these things, that she could also heal physical wounds. Not everything. Like she couldn’t stop an arterial bleed completely. She could slow it and she could encourage the body to amp up its blood production to make up for some of the loss, but she couldn’t stop it entirely. Mostly she pictured encouraging the white blood cells in the body to target injuries and that seemed to work. If she overthought it, well, it didn’t.
It was more like an intuitive connection with what flowed through bodies, like an extension of her connection to emotions which she often suspected had to do with the flux of chemicals that caused emotional responses. No one had ever actually explained her Magick to her and, honestly, she kind of was afraid if they did and what they explained was different than how she understood her Magick it might just stop working. Anyhow, she could fix injuries like the one in Dempsey’s shoulder. Which she did before stepping back and rubbing her hand on the leg of her pants to clear away the feeling of energy crawling over her palm.
“You should be good now. Can you rotate your shoulder?”
Dempsey did that, the tension in his face relaxing as he felt the ease with which he did so. As usual seeing the product of her Magick brought a bloom of warmth to her chest. She rubbed idly at her breastbone and backed away further from Dempsey, propping her shoulders against the mirrored wall to the right.
“How does this work?” She tapped the mirror with her palm. “Did you activate all the mirrors when you first touched one or do you have to touch each one to activate it?”
Dempsey gave the mirror behind her a long look. “I’m not sure. Normally I’d say its an object by object thing but I didn’t go into that first hidden area and I didn’t touch anything in there, but we still got a mirror you come out of there.”
“So, we have to assume it doesn’t matter if you touch any more mirrors.”
“Yeah. But I’m still going to keep my hands off them.”
“Makes sense.” Gwen clipped her plunger to her belt then pulled out the map she’d started of the maze. “Judging by this I don’t think we’ve covered more than a third of this space. We should keep moving.”
Dempsey nodded his agreement. “What do you think?”
Gwen blinked hard. “You’re asking me what I think?”
“Yes.”
“You’re not just going to scoop me up and carry me around like a caveman?”
“Do you want me to?”
Gwen rolled her eyes. “Uh, no.”
“So, answer the question.”
“What question?”
It was Dempsey’s turn to roll his eyes to the heavens, like he thought he’d find an answer there. After several drawn out mikros he turned his gaze to Gwen. “”What do you think?”
“About what?”
Gwen smirked and then outright snorted when Dempsey threw his gaze upwards again. Which alerted him to her poking at him. Which then had him looking at her with a pointed stare.
Gwen tossed her hand up. “I couldn’t resist.”
Dempsey made a point of looking up and down the mirrored corridor. “If we go back to the point where you ran into that corner we have three directions we could go in.”
“Well,” Gwen fingered her lip as she looked at the map. “We could keep going right but I think that will walk us into another wall. See?” She waved Dempsey over to look at the map, tracing her finger along a possible route extrapolating from the columns she’d already drawn on the paper. “I think the only option there is hit the wall and turn left or right. Right will take us back where we came from.”
“There wasn’t another hall way there.”
“Or was there? These mirrors are doing weird things to perspective. Plus add in the sliding panels. Any dead end could actually be an opening.”
“Huh.” Dempsey nodded. “Makes sense. So are you saying go right and then left.” He leaned in to press a broad fingertip to the map. Gwen eyed his bulk from the side of her eye. She hadn’t really noticed how big he was. Not really. Up until he hauled her up against his chest and ran like she was the weight of a doll. Which, ps, she was not. She wasn’t heavy, really, but she sure wasn’t the kind of delicate and petite most people grabbed and carried except in a fireman’s hold and that was really not comfortable. Not like the way Dempsey had carried her.
Whoa, Gwen, back on point! She focused on Dempsey’s finger, tracing a path on the paper. “Or,” she suggested,”we could keep heading inward to find the center. I think we’re pretty close.”
“Why the center?”
“As above so below?”
Dempsey slanted her a look. “What?”
“Quod est inferius est sicut quod est superius. Its from sacred geometry. Also the tarot. You know, like your deck of cards?”
“And?”
“Separating from a lot of woo woo stuff it can be taken to mean that the microcosm reflects the macrocosm.”
“Your smarter than you look.”
“Gee, thanks.”
“Still not completely getting why you said it.”
Gwen pointed vaguely in the direction they’d entered the mirror maze from. “We followed a hedge maze and found a center where the heart of the mystery could be said to lie. So, maybe this maze,” she swept her hand out, indicating the mirrors, “does the same.”
“So, find the center.”
Gwen nodded. “So, find the center.”
Dempsey pointed down the corridor. “You lead.”
“Okay.” Gwen tucked the map into her waistband again and walked to the point where the switchback of mirror formed the tight corner she’d run into. Dempsey kept back so he didn’t risk contacting any of the mirrors this time. Rotating so she was facing the direction opposite the corner, Gwen squinted down the corridor. It was really hard to tell if there was another mirror cutting across the path. They really kind of had to walk into them to really see what was real and what was just the illusion of space messing with their brains. Lucky for her she was really good at refocusing her brain from tiny details to see the big picture.
“We need to move forward.”
“Okay.”
Gwen noted the direction on the map and then started forward slowly, holding her hands out slightly in front of her so they’d meet any mirror they came to before her face did. Learning!
Her hand hit mirror about twenty feet straight ahead. Running her hand along the surface she determined it tipped back about a hundred thirty-five degrees, roughly, although, really she could be that precise as the angles in this maze seemed to be exact.
The mirror adjusted slightly under her hand. “This one moves. Open it or leave it?”
Dempsey hesitated to answer for a moment, then suggested, “Leave it for now. Because if there’s another funhouse mirror in there that’s going to produce something else to fight I’d rather we have a few meros before we have to do that again.”
Gwen nodded at that wisdom. “Okay, moving forward along the wall to my left.”
She noted this on the map then did exactly that. The optics continued to be disorienting, but she narrowed down to following what she could feel – the mirror under her hand – rather than what she saw – a lot of other mirrors leading off on weird angles. Roughly forty feet further down the corridor the wall under her hand veered to the left, again at what felt like a sharp one hundred and thirty-five degrees.
“Heading left.”
“Following you.”
“Am I going too fast?”
“No. Keep going.”
“Okay.” Gwen noted the wall and the angle on her map then placed her hand on the wall and continued walking forward until her fingers met a pillar around forty feet down the hall. She lifted her hand from the glass and continued walking forward until she hit another wall. She’d kind of figured she would but did it for the sake of her diagram, which she amended to add the wall before stepping back to the pillar at the end of the angled wall.
She turned to look at Dempsey. “Our options seem to be move to the left along this wall or switch back hard on this pillar here.” She tapped it for emphasis.
Dempsey eyed the mirror in front of them then turned and looked at the pillar. “What do you think?”
“If we are looking for the center I say we switchback.”
“Makes sense.”
“Okay.” Gwen marked the direction on the map then walked around the pillar, trailing her hand over it. The angle switched back hard. Maybe another hundred and thirty-five degrees. “I think this is the back of the last wall.”
“So we’re heading back where we came from?”
“Maybe?”
Gwen continued forward, trailing her hand along the mirror. About forty feet down she came to another pillar which she noted on the map. “I think this is the same path exactly. Forty feet. Pillar and turn to the left. Pillar and fully around then another forty feet and another pillar.”
“Keep going.”
Gwen did exactly that, walking, again another forty feet and coming to another pillar. “I think this is all laid out on a grid of right angle triangles of forty feet.”
“Meaning?”
“Nothing. Or probably nothing. It’s just interesting.”
“You think it could mean something?”
“No. Just this place is really big. It didn’t feel that big when we started.”
“Yeah. Could be its adjusting.”
“To what?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you think its trying to make it harder for us?”
“I don’t know.”
“But isn’t the working theory The House is helping us?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well,” Gwen turned and planted her hands on her hips, craning her neck to look up at Dempsey. “What do you know?”
He shrugged and started to say something but she held up a finger. “If you say I don’t know I might punch you.”
“No. You wouldn’t.”
Gwen scrunched up her nose. “No I wouldn’t. But I would glower.”
“Okay.”
Gwen rolled her eyes. “You are irritating.”
“Okay.” When she just held his stare he looked pointedly down the hall behind her. “Keep going?”
Gwen heaved a sigh. It was really hard to stay even marginally irritted with the guy. What was up with that? “Whatever.”
She marked the wall on the map and then walked forward until her hand came to another column. Forty feet, or one triangular floor panel, down. The mirror mounted in the column pointed to the right. It felt like forty-five degrees to the right, Gwen estimated, trailing her hand along the mirror. Another floor tiles length and she felt another pillar. The mirror attached to this one pointed back to the left. She noted the forty-five degrees right, then the mirror to the left on the map then frowned. “I could be wrong but this appears to be a square.” She waved the paper back towards Dempsey while keeping her hand planted on the column. “See?”
Dempsey took the paper, rattling it lightly, then handed it back to Gwen. “It does. You think its the center?”
“I do. I’m betting we walk back around to where I found the sliding panel. I think its the center we’ve been looking for.”
“Or its a room full of grotesque monsters.”
“That is a possibility.”
“Sounds fun.” Sadly – weirdly? – he really did sound like he meant it.
“Loads.”
Gwen trailed her hand along the mirror, which as she’d suspected terminated one triangular tiles length forward at another pillar which held another mirror set at a one hundred and thirty-five degree angle that, per her map, if she followed it would bring them back to facing the tight corner she’d mashed her face into.
“Pretty sure we’re back where we started.”
“Feels like we walked in a circle sort of.”
“So I think we need to open the door.”
“Agreed.”
“Just wanted to confirm.”
“You’re stalling.”
“I am.”
With that Gwen unclipped her plunger from her belt and walked along the wall to the post and turned left to face what, by her diagram, should be the sliding door. With the optical effects of the mirrors she could be totally off though, so she laid her left hand on the mirror and gave it a gentle push. It slid back on the track formed by the edge of the triangular tile. Gwen tensed and raised her plunger, preparing herself for whatever was in the space.
Dempsey sidled in behind her, the layout of the mirrors giving him the room to move without risk of touching a surface. Gwen looked back at him. At his nod she shoved the panel all the way to the right, revealing a dark space beyond.
Gwen counted to three. When nothing came ambling out at them, she took a tentative step into the space and gulped as she was reflected back multiple times from the wall to her left. Multiple times upon multiple times, Gwen upon Gwen marching back into the depths of the mirrors. And not one of them was a fun-house image. She poked her head back out to the corridor.
“I think we’re good. You should come in.”
She stepped back along the wall to let Dempsey through the entrance then started a slow tour of the interior, starting on the left wall nearest the sliding panel. On entering Dempsey took a sharp right, going along the wall in that direction. Gwen had almost reached the end of the wall and was just approaching what she was calling the back wall when Dempsey said, “Uh, Gwen?”
Gwen shifted to look into the mirrors of the back wall, searching out Dempsey’s reflection in it. He stood about halfway down the front wall and was leaning forward to stare intently into the mirror in front of him. She almost cautioned him to be careful not to come in contact with it when she caught his reflection bouncing back from the mirror she was looking at. The Dempsey in the reflection was really short and really wide, like almost a cube of Dempsey. Or maybe a big bouncy ball would be a better reference. Either way, a totally distorted Dempsey.
“Dempsey? Is that a fun-house mirror?”
“I’d say it a bunch of fun-house mirrors.”
“Don’t move!”
“I’m not. You don’t move either. The mirrors before this one weren’t weird. So, if you don’t move maybe you won’t get reflected in this one?”
“Uhm,” Gwen stopped with her foot held suspended, already about halfway down the stretch of the wall, and darted a look back over her shoulder. Her eyes stared back at her from Dempsey’s mirror. Because she was a solid thirty to forty feet away from him she appeared a whole lot smaller than he did. “Too late?”
Dempsey turned and looked where she was looking and then cursed. “Well, that’s great.”
“I’d say let’s get out of here,” Gwen gestured with her thumb for the entrance to the space, “but we haven’t found the piece of the lamp.”
“Actually,” Dempsey scrubbed the back of his neck with hi”s hand, “we have.”
Gwen squinted across the space. “Where?”
Dempsey jerked a thumb back towards his reflection in the mirror. It remained frozen there, facing out instead of reflecting its back like a normal mirror would. “Check his neck.”
“It’s too far. I can’t-” Straining her eyes to see Gwen started moving forwards towards Dempsey.
“Stop!” Dempsey held up a hand. Gwen stopped.
“If you come closer it might grab a better reflection from you. Stay there. I’ll come to you.”
With that he lay his hand on the pommel of his sword and slowly walked towards Gwen. He shifted his gaze between her and the mirror behind her. “Is it getting any smaller?”
“Your reflection?”
“Yeah.”
“No.”
“So. I say we get out of here. Betting they’ll follow again.”
“Okay.” Gwen slowly sidled sideways, keeping her attention focused on the mirror and Dempsey’s and her distorted images. Without turning Dempsey did the same, side-stepping slowly to the left and towards the exit.
He’d walked maybe twenty steps when movement in the mirror caught Gwen’s eye. The movement was roly-poly Dempsey stepping out of the mirror.
At her sharp “Dempsey!” normal, real Dempsey turned around, facing the Dempsey quick waddling his way towards him with shield held firm and sword on high.
“Damn it!” Dempsey fell into a loose stance, waiting for Roly-Poly Dempsey to reach him. A wise choice as he risked getting more reflections if he moved. Gwen slanted her gaze down the line of mirrors to the left, seeing what Dempsey had, which every mirror from the halfway point on that wall was a fun-house one. If either of them stepped past the center line they could end up with more than one doppelganger. Which was probably not a good thing.
No, Gwen thought, as her own doppelganger stepped out of the mirror and waddled towards her. For a moment she was struck by just how darned cute tiny little, round Gwen was because that’s just the way Gwen’s mind went. Sometimes she’d wish otherwise but wishes and fishes or whatever.
The Gwen approaching her was only about three-feet tall and looked to be pretty close to that much across too. She waddled like a penguin, shifting her weight from one foot to the other in a rolling gait that managed to be a lot faster than Gwen would have thought. Weirdly the plunger she held was the right size and the right shape and she wielded it like she wanted to take Gwen’s head off. She might have to jump like a kangaroo to reach Gwen’s head but the look on the little face coming at her suggested she was ready to try. Weirdly the head and the face were the right size, which was to say they matched Gwen’s proportions. Her arms looked oddly spindly.
Really, Gwen really didn’t get how the mirror warped her to be that way. That was all the time she had for thought though as Round Gwen picked up her waddle pace by more than half and came galloping at Gwen already swinging her plunger. Gwen fell into her stance easily, swinging her plunger around to block the other. The sheer force of Round Gwen’s hit sent Gwen stumbling to the left. Right where she didn’t want to be.
In between blocking Round Gwen’s swing and coming back around, Gwen jerked her head up and met the eyes of her reflection in the fun-house mirror next to the one Round Gwen had come from. The mirror must have been a similar shape to the first as the Gwen reflected back was shorter and wider, though not the roundness of “I turned to a blueberry” Gwen who was even now barreling down on Gwen from the right.
“We’ve got to get out of here!” she hollered at Dempsey in between blocking Round Gwen’s next swing and watching with apprehension as Slightly Less Round Gwen stepped out of the mirror and came waddling towards her. This Gwen was a little taller than Round Gwen, seeing as Gwen had advanced a bit into the center of the room, adjusting the perspective of the reflection which generated Slightly Less Round Gwen.
“You think?” Dempsey yelled back. Gwen snapped a real fast look his way. Despite fending off hits from Roly-Poly Dempsey and getting a few in himself Dempsey was slowly moving towards the entrance and, blessedly, away from the wall of fun-house mirrors. At least they’d only have to handle one distorted Dempsey. Now Gwen just had to get out of here, while fending off her two copies, and not move any more towards the left along the fun-house mirror wall.
Easy Peasy. Lemon Flippin’ Squeazy.
“Ow!” she snapped as Slightly Less Gwen got a swing in with her plunger. It was smaller than Gwen’s and also Round Gwen’s, something in the mirror’s warp making it so. And was Gwen glad for it as it didn’t make quite as big an impact as the plunger Round Gwen swung in from the right, catching Gwen upside the face and sending her spinning. To the left. And in front of another flippin’ mirror.
Swell! Gwen had, oh two mikros to catch the new distorted reflection in this mirror before Slightly Less Gwen came diving in, swinging for her knees. Her attention focused on the mirror where another Gwen, this one with normal length legs, slightly wide torso, and oh a head four times the right size but with almost the right proportions stared at her, Gwen responded with instinct, blocking the swing which might have taken her to the floor. She did not want to consider what would happen then. Height, at this point, was about all she had over Round and Slightly Less Round Gwens.
Sparing a quarter mikro to look at where Round and Slightly Less Round Gwen’s were positioned, she darted hard towards her right and as far away as she could get from the fun-house mirrors. Dempsey, thankfully, had managed to move his fight towards the entrance. He stepped out, jabbing his sword towards Roly-Poly Dempsey and driving him from the room. Gwen tried to follow but Round Gwen came waddle-barreling from the left and caught her a good one across the back of the knees.
Gwen went flying forward, barely catching herself before her chin hit the floor. “Oof!” was about all she had time to say before she felt knees come down hard on the back of her calves, effectively pinning her to the ground.
“Oh, no! You do not!” She flung all her weight to the side, rolling over to her back. Slightly Less Gwen went flying towards the back wall, ejected from her position on Gwen’s legs.
Gwen wished she had the core strength or whatever to kip up like those chick heroes in movies but, yeah, she knew her strengths and they were not in her core. So she didn’t waste any time trying for something fancy, just dug her heels in and scooted herself back across the floor like a sled. Round Gwen came rolling at her at what was probably her top speed. Big Head Gwen – honestly she needed to stay far away from those fun-house mirrors as she was running out of names for her alts – was just finishing pulling herself out of the mirror and was slowly turning that big head to look at Gwen. Meanwhile Slightly Less Gwen was picking herself up slowly from where she’d been kicked about twenty feet away.
Faced with fighting off three versions of herself Gwen did the sensible thing, shoved herself to her feet, and hauled butt for the entrance and the possibility of help from Dempsey. Ugh. Right about now she’d really love to have Magick that was good in a fight. But no, she had to be this sensitive person who made meaningful connections with people. Right now she’d much rather be able to make connections with people’s faces!
Dempsey had stopped real short of the entrance to the secret room which meant Gwen ran smack into his back as she ran from there.
“Move!” she yelled.
“Can’t! Fighting!” he shot back.
Gwen dropped to his left and blocked a swing from Roly-Poly Dempsey’s teeny sword, spitting out as she did so, “Three Gwens incoming!”
Dempsey spared a mikro to look down at her. “Really?”
“Yes! Block!”
Dempsey raised his shield at Gwen’s prompt, stopping Roly-Poly Dempsey’s next swing. “What part of don’t go near the mirrors was confusing?”
“All of it?”
The sound of feet on tile came from behind them. Gwen pivoted and pressed her back to Dempsey’s. “If we beat your Dempsey do you think this will stop?”
“No. But we will have the piece we need. We just, oof,” his back juttered against Gwen’s, “get it off him before we shove him through a mirror.”
“Okay. So we have to, darn it,” Gwen broke off to block the swings of Big Head Gwen and Slightly Less Gwen. She was able to block the regular sized plunger Big Head swung at her, but really misjudged the dimensions of Slightly Less Gwen’s which slipped past her guard and jabbed her a solid one in the stomach. “Ow, my uterus!”
Dempsey’s back shuddered against hers.
“Are you,” she stopped to bat Big Head Gwen in the side of her, well, Big Head and kick Slightly Less Gwen in her spindly leg. Once that was done she spat, “laughing at me?”
“No.” Dempsey ruined the denial by snorting.
“Ugh,” block, swing, block, swat, “if we weren’t in a fight for our lives against,” Gwen broke off to lunge forward and swing low to send Round Gwen rolling off her feet, “alternate versions, ah stop!” she hollered taking another hit from Slightly Less’ tiny plunger, “of ourselves I’d, really?” taking two giant steps forward she swung her plunger from left to right, managing to catch Slightly Less in the throat and Big Head, again, in the head, “punch you!”
“I didn’t catch that!” Dempsey had the temerity to yell back.
“Fine.” Gwen popped her butt back, catching Dempsey somewhere between knees and hips and driving him forward. From there she pivoted, spinning to Dempsey’s side then dancing in front of him to clock an unsuspecting Roly-Poly Dempsey on top of the head. Roly-Poly’s head went back, his neck jutted forward, and his roly-poly behind flew out in some twisted version of a twerk.
It was kind of cute. It was clear by Dempsey’s yell that he didn’t find it quite as cute when three distorted Gwen’s applied their plungers to various parts of his frame.
Gwen darted forward while Roly-Poly Dempsey was still stuck in his awkward gyration and snatched the piece of glass hanging off a thin chain from around his neck. “I’ll take that!”
Roly-Poly Dempsey jerked himself out of his awkward position and brought his sword forward towards Gwen but she was already dancing well free of him. Ten years of dance class, beat that, buddy!
Something about his dimensions made Roly-Poly Dempsey over-extend swinging at Gwen. It was the opening she needed to shuffle-ball-slide her way over to the side of him then kick-ball-change, kick-ball-change, kick-ball-change against his shield, driving him backwards and into the mirror behind him. She paused a spare mikro to shove the glass piece and the chain into the side pocket of her cargo pants, then reared back and did a high kick which caught Roly-Poly Dempsey somewhere in the region of his groin if his wide-eyed expression and high-pitched scream were anything to go by. He stumbled back the remaining distance and the mirror swallowed him. Gwen spared a real quick look for his pained expression then spun to see how Dempsey was faring with Gwen’s 1, 2, and 3.
Not too bad, actually. A shield and a sword seemed a fairly decent combination to combat three people wielding plungers. Good to know. Not that she was ever going to attack him but maybe, just maybe, she did wait a few extra mikros to watch his moves before she stepped in next to him and blocked a swing from Round Gwen. She had to go real low to do it, seeing as Round Gwen’s swings naturally were in the region of Gwen’s knees.
“Plie!” she hollered. Then rising on her toes to really bring the force of her movement to her swing, she yelled “Releve!” while bringing her plunger from down low and knocking Round Gwen tumbling back off her feet with the force of the hit.
Slightly Less Gwen stopped and stared at her, then did credible robot, ending with her tiny plunger pointed at Gwen. “Dance Battle!”
Gwen did a fast robot back. “Oh, its on Little Gwen!”
“Oh, shit!” Dempsey snapped, but he didn’t have any more time to say more as Big Head Gwen came sweeping in on his right, ducked beneath his shield and popped him somewhere under it. What Gwen was busy. She couldn’t turn her eyes from Slightly Less Gwen to be sure where Big Head hit. It might have been the dick, by the whoof Dempsey gave. Which might not be good, but Gwen didn’t have time to spare!
She took up a stance legs slightly apart and jabbed a finger gun on her left hand and her plunger in her right rhythmically towards her thrusting hips.
Slightly Less Gwen did a chaines turn, holding her little plunger out so Gwen had to dart back or take a hard hit to the legs. Gwen goggled for a mikro because that was badass spinning like that with an object held out and not loosing her center? Slightly Less Gwen had moves.
Digging deep, Gwen executed a feather step, ending with her right foot outside Slightly Less Gwen’s. Then she did an outside turn, twisting Slight Less Gwen so her center shifted and she tipped over Gwen’s leg.
Slightly Less Gwen’s wide-eyes clearly telegraphed “not fair!” as she glided beautifully through the air towards the mirrored wall. Disengaging her leg from Slightly Less Gwen’s, Gwen did a modified spin turn, swinging her free arm out to contact Slightly Less Gwen’s back and guide her smoothly, face first, through the mirror.
She couldn’t help it. She let her joy at the short but intense fight carry her back in a cabriole, landing a short foot from Round Gwen who had found her feet since Gwen had sent her flying. Or rolling.
“Ballet!” She yelled, throwing her hand up like a bullfighter, translating the classic “Ole!” into a more appropriate word for the moment.
Round Gwen seemed unimpressed. Rather than gawk or maybe applaud – that would have been nice – she waddled forward and jammed her plunger between Gwen’s legs, yanking up like she was going to, uh, ring Gwen’s something. Not a bell. Gwen jumped backwards, legs going out in a center leap she knew she was going to be feeling the next day. She was a strength over stretch dancer and that move was all stretch, even if she only got her feet to the range of her waist instead of her ribs or shoulders like real stretch dancers could.
Again Round Gwen was sadly unmoved by Gwen’s virtuoso efforts. Mouth open on a silent scream she came at Gwen fast and low, because low was about the only way she was coming at her. Gwen landed, bringing her plunger down in a hard arc powered by the impetus of her leap. Round Gwen seemed unprepared for that, proving she was just a copy of Gwen’s appearance and not a copy of her essence seeing as Gwen knew if it was her and an opponent had done such a leap she would have anticipated the swing of the plunger coming down that way.
Anyhow, she was glad Round Gwen didn’t anticipate it as she managed to send her alt spiraling sideways, her shoulder hitting and then sliding through the mirror to her left like a knife through butter. Gwen turned, adding a tiny flourish to the move, to assess where Dempsey was. Which was bashing Big Head Gwen repeatedly with his shield, never giving her a moment to recover, so she had to back-pedal until she fell through the mirror behind her.
Gwen held up her hand for a high-five. Dempsey just looked at her. Eventually he grunted. “Where’s the piece?’
“Wow, thanks Gwen for grabbing the lamp piece from my Roly-Poly doppelganger! So glad you have quick wits and awesome dance moves!” Okay, maybe she was still riding a little bit of a high from the fight but, c’mon, Dance Battle!
Dempsey just shook his head, his expression so full of sad it really brought Gwen down. Way down. So down she decided she wasn’t going to dig in her pocket and give him the piece. Instead she pulled the map out of her underwear where it had slipped during the fight and the dancing – look, you keep a piece of paper jammed in your waistband during a fight. She was lucky it had gone down instead of out – oriented herself and freestyled her way down the right hand turn and all the way to the entrance of the maze.
She threw a lot of stank on it, turning to thumb her nose at Dempsey several times as he skulked behind her along the halls. The only reason she stopped when they got to the window out of there was because she couldn’t figure out a good way to get over the windowsill besides leaping up to it and her legs were already sending her a bill for the center leap. So instead she stopped, straightened her clothes, then turned and planted her butt on the windowsill to pivot and swing her legs up, around, and out into the room at the center of the maze.
Once her feet were planted on the marble she turned back and made a beckoning hand gesture at Dempsey. He very clearly rolled his eyes then stepped up and through the window to join her.
“Lamp piece?” He held his hand out to her. Deciding to be magnanimous, and because her legs were starting to alternately feel like jelly and knotted fists – a fantastic combination – now that the adrenaline was oozing from her, she dug the piece out of her pocket and held it out to Dempsey.
It was shaped like a small hand mirror, the frame of it formed by minute pieces of gilded glass and the surface as mirrored as the walls they’d left behind.
“Thanks,” Dempsey said, all gruff, and yanked it from her hand.
“You’re welcome,” she sing-songed to his back as he walked over to the table. The table was large enough that even with his height he couldn’t reach the lamp just by leaning. So he hefted himself up on it and slid forward to place the glass in the spot it was clearly meant for on the lamp shade. As soon as he did the light from the lamp filtered through it, the mirror showing up next to the harp and above the bracelet in the image cast on the sky. Along the lower curve of the mirror frame the words “and see my” showed up, flowing smoothly with the words “to my palace” running along the ribbon above the bracelet.
Not that Gwen had taken a long look at the piece they recovered but she hadn’t seen any words on it. Maybe they were in some color that only showed when the light hid it. Or maybe it was Magick.
It was probably Magick.
Enter The Woods 